Archive 12/03/09 - (2)

   

'Tis the Sino-Season

                                                                  

 

 

'Tis the season to be seasoned, seasonally speaking,

To trip, tipplingly tipsily, the spirited life fantastic,

Ho-ho-hoing irreverence, profanity, arrogance, condescension.

 

Between Thanksgiving and Christmas,

It's all about donning your mask of comedy, going Falstaffian,

No matter that America is in the last act of Macdeath,

 

Rehearsing A Tragedy of Errors, All's Not Well That Ends Well,

A Midsummer Nightmare's American Dream,

For its tour of Communist China's hangdog Guangdong Province.

 

But each year, it gets infinitely more tribulational, for me,

To get with the program, get my lines down, my cues,

Master the nuances, jargons, argots, demotics

 

Of Mandarin, Cantonese, Min, Gan, Jinyu, Xiang, Wu,

As well as the myriad minor intonations of obscure dialects,

Realizing that before the next score of years,

 

Maybe less than a decade from this unfeasibly treacly season,

All of us here in the United States's vast democratic oasis

Will have sold our cold, materialistic souls to the Politburo,

 

Cried our deficited Uncle Sams, from our service-sector rectums,

Surrendered lock, stocks, like shooting fish in a barrel,

To Hu Jintao's mandated surrogates for ThanXgiving and Xmas.

 

And when the fated day eventuates, that I prostrate myself

To the Orientalized holidays, celebrations, events,

I'll be seized with my final seasonal seizure of the seasons,

 

Raising a rice-wine toast to the Butterball god gobbler, Confucius,

As I stuff my gut, with his stuffy philosophic fluff,

Glut my butt, with dim-sum drumsticks and lo-mein stuffing,

 

Sitting on Santa Mao's lap, whispering, into his white whiskers,

My wish list: a garage to live in; a bag of garbage, for food;

And a preowned rickshaw, to transport my family to the laogai.

 

 

 

 

 

                                               

 

12/03/09 - (2)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 
 
 
       

 

 
   
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