Archive
12/06/09 - (1)
Last Worm and Testicle
I, the testicular testator, being of not-sound mind and de vito body, This end of the beginning of whatever week of Mondays it is, In the Lord's Year of Our Anonymity, etc., etc.,
Do here- and thereby declare that my entire earthwormly estate Be distributed among all my unknown next of kith and kin, Those whose testicles I drew, quartered, and neutered
And all those whose balls I left sealed in their hermetic scrotums, For technical reasons unknown to them, unspoken by me, As I was going through my tribulations of saving mankind,
Lo those many years ago, when I yet believed That aeration could enrich the human community, with compassion, Cure its dystopian rage for phages, malaises, and plagues,
Lift it out of its blighted, moldy subsoil, make it weep, beg penance, Turn over new leaves of topsoil gospel, Only to realize that we worms are at the core of every apple
And apples are just rotten gonads hanging from the tree of evil good. Didn't a worm make Eve eat both of Adam's apples, from his tree, Leaving him and us impotent to create creatures of decency?
On this day, I, the testiculator, bequeath my annelid disillusionment To my fellow earth- and penis worms, to do with as they see fit. And if they reject it, then donate my life's work to Applebee's.
Signed, Castor "The Bagman" Geldenshearer
12/06/09 - (1)
|
|||
|
|||
